Read Online The Men in My Country Sightline Books Marilyn Abildskov Books

Product details Series Sightline Books Paperback 168 pages Publisher University Of Iowa Press; 1 edition (June 1, 2013) Language English ISBN-10 1587294494

The Men in My Country Sightline Books Marilyn Abildskov Books Reviews

• I picked this up because I thought it was about teaching in Japan. Having taught abroad (China and Egypt), and having taught many Japanese students in the US, I thought it was a travel book about the teaching experience.
  
  It turned out to be something very different. It is common knowledge among expat teachers, that some US men teach abroad to meet women, who "unlike American women, know how to treat a guy". As I got beyond the introductory pages about sensing and "watching" Japan, I wondered if this book was about the reverse, liberated American women shattering a taboo and having sexual exploits in a foreign land.
  
  Further into the book, there is more insight. This is a highly sensitive person, looking for a place, affirmation, love, or maybe permanance in a world that hasn't offered it to her. Needs transcend her awareness of the wake she leaves behind. Despite her deep love (or is it need) for one man, she entertains two others. The man she loves wants her in some way, but is emotionally unavailable. Of the other two, one is married, and the other, as a worker in a noodle factory is not a serious suitor. I would expect that both have emotional scars from their relationship with the author. None of the three men speaks English well enough to have a normal, let alone nuanced, conversation with her.
  
  The book chronicles, after 7 years retrospect, her memories of the encounters, from her observation, along with a backdrop of the intrigue of a foreign adventure.
  
  I would recommend this to anyone going through a romantic breakup. Like a conversation with a fellow sufferer, it could offer a balm. The pain comes through the detail of obsession for the lost. The writing is very good, and I like the remembered conversations italicized and not quoted, since there is no way they can be exact. For those looking for a travel adventure, or insight into teaching English, this is not the book.
  
  The cover is great. The oragami figures in subtle colors clearly evoke Japan.
• As one who has been there, denying all evidence that a man is through with me, and as one who has gone to ridiculous lengths trying to get him back, I not only felt less the fool as I read this book, I felt rewarded for having suffered. It helped connect me with the subtle, feminine, honest mind that was revealing itself on the page. Reading Abildskov, I was in more inspiring company than with the man. I agree with Terry Tempest William's praise of this book. "When T. S. Eliot speaks of transient beauty born out of sorrow," this is what he was talking about. Except the beauty is not transient. The sorrow was, but not the beauty. It will last as long as the book exists.
• This is a lovely work about a women's journey to find what love might mean- and no way is it trite. Ms. Abildskov is placed in a foreign country with new stimulations, finding for herself that love can show itself in a variety of forms and yet hasn't she maybe felt love before without recognizing its subtle ways? I hated to have this story end. I held myself back reading- trying to let each moment penetrate my feelings as they might have Ms. Abildskov. Her descriptions are as beautiful as they are heavy, letting me visualize and feel the weight of her emotions.
  
  A lyrical non-fiction memoir that left me feeling like I had been granted a gentle good-bye
  
  "Are you sorry to go? I ask
  
  Kind of, one woman says
  
  In a way chimes the other. But it's time, you know what I mean? You can't stay forever. I mean this isn't real life." (page 115)
  
  Stay inside the real life Ms. Abildskov recreates and savor the moments. I for one was very sorry to go.
• I could NOT put this book down. Ms. Abildskov has created a story of such difficult beauty and courage, such clear and striking insight, such sweetness and humor and fury, every page took my breath away. A journey, from the moment I opened the book to the wee hours of the morning. I cannot recommend this book highly enough.
• Abildskov perfectly portrays the heartbreak of loving more than one can be loved. In liquid prose, she both startles and cajols, rendering a painfully honest tale of heartbreak. I read this beautiful book in a single sitting.